Stone Soup! (and bacon and eggs)

When I was a much younger child (about 5 or 6, i don't exactly remember), I recall watching Sesame Street (which was popular back in the day before people thought that Ernie and Bert were gay lovers nor cared whether Big Bird was a male or female). Or was it Captain Kangaroo?  Long live Mr. Green Jeans.  Anyways, there was a story being told called 'Stone Soup.'   Some of you may recall this story about how a family fed themselves with a simple pot of water and a stone at the advice of some bird or something like that.  You might ask yourself, "How the heck did they feed themselves with just a stone and water?"   I asked myself the same thing.  Well, as I recall, the bird advised the family to add carrots to the soup to help give it flavor.  Then they'd add a little bit of spice.  Then somehow they came across some potatoes and a side of beef.   Then magically they found a bottle of chianti to wash it down.  Wait a minute.  How did a hungry family which was begging for food suddenly come across all of this food when just two minutes ago they only had a pot and a stone?  It may not have actually happened that way, but that's how I remember it.  I was five, give me a break!

Where are you going with this, Dan?

Periodically we get customers who come in for just an oil change.  No problem, it usually takes about thirty to forty-five minutes to complete. 

"Great!  I'll go ahead and wait on that, you have free WiFi, right?"

Most of our customers do understand that we're not a Jiffy Lube; we don't have a dedicated pit where four to five teenagers attack a car ripping out all the filters to show the customer how dirty they are and how they will die if they don't flush their transmission fluid.  No, we have one dedicated technician that does our complete oil changes while our other technicians are busy with other repair work.  Every so often within this group of oil change customers we'll get someone who will request other work while the car is in the air.  Now this is usually not a problem if they want us to do a tire rotation or to just check brake pad thickness, but we do get some odd requests.

"Oh, while you're doing the oil change can you have someone check out the radiator?  The car is overheating."

"Oh, also, there's this knocking noise that only happens when it's 40 degrees outside and I'm traveling over this particular road near my neighborhood.  Can you check that out, too?"

"You all top off fluids, too, right?  I know that I have a freon leak in my a/c, you'll top that off, too, right?"

Suddenly our stone soup 30-minute oil change job has turned into a 3-hour diagnostic procedure and the customer doesn't quite understand why they can't wait on it?  The reality is we can't just poop carrots and potatoes.  An engine overheating can be caused by at least three different problems (lack of coolant, no fan operation, stuck thermostat etc.)  The freon issue (which is a gas, by the way, and not a fluid) will require a leak detect because freon is supposed to recirculate through the system during the life of the vehicle.  If you're low, you have a leak.  Finally, we probably couldn't fit a quick drive to your neighborhood in the winter during that 30-minute wait.

Remember, the purpose of this blog isn't to call any of my customers <ahem> uneducated, the purpose is to provide useful information to you on what's expected of certain situations and why!  Always keep in mind that if you see a room full of customers waiting to all have their oil changed, you may be in for quite a siesta!  Bring a book or drop it off.  Otherwise, we do provide shuttle service to and from work, unless you live in Bastrop. (in which case if you do live in Bastrop you'll have to call ahead and schedule an appointment for that ride.  ask for Jeanette!)

Now that we're all hungry and on the subject of food, let's talk about our bacon and eggs special.  You might visit a shop and hear some yelling in the background along the lines of, "Bacon and eggs special!"   Chances are you brought your own parts or provided your own oil and filter.  We don't bicker about it unless it's a big job.  We don't expect you to come in with a complete engine gasket set and say, "Reseal my engine."  It's even ok to bring in your own specific engine oil and filter if you like. The term comes from a comparison of walking into your local McDonalds, handing them a muffin, a slice of cheese and an egg and say, "I'd like an egg mcmuffin, please. <smile>"   We do keep the lights on by not just charging for labor but also for parts.  Bear in mind that if you do bring in your own parts that we don't provide a warranty.  Not only that, but if they don't fit your car and your car is now stuck on our lift while you get the correct parts you will be charged for the amount of lost revenue for monopolizing that particular bay.  And finally, if your part fails six months down the line you will be paying labor again to install replacement parts even if your parts are being swapped out by your supplier for free.  Suddenly it doesn't sound like a very good idea to bring your own parts, does it?  Again, we don't mind doing the work just be prepared for the consequences if any of the above scenarios pan out.

Mmmmm....bacon and eggs.